


10000 hours.

by legalmurder



Category: BC221 - Fandom, ONER
Genre: Angst, Chaptered, Drabble, Future Fic, M/M, Mentions of Sex, Post-Break Up, alternative universe, buyue, guess ill continue this someday and actually finish it, i wrote this when i was bored
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-06-09
Updated: 2018-06-09
Packaged: 2019-05-20 03:34:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 503
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14886848
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/legalmurder/pseuds/legalmurder
Summary: bu fan does not want to make the same mistakes again when he meets yue minghui.





	10000 hours.

**Author's Note:**

> 10000 hours by the cosmos people is one of the most beautiful songs i have ever listened to.

“ended it far too quickly, didn’t we?”

  
bu fan looked over to minghui slinging his arm casually around the low railing of the edge, as if it wasn’t a sheer 40 feet drop to the bottom, because bu fan knew that through experience- things like altitude and danger didn’t matter to yue minghui. he smoked like he lived: way too fast, puffing out one breath after another in a greedy frenzy.

  
“ended what?”

  
bu fan had learned to answer nonchalance with nonchalance. he had learned to look the very image of carelessness after all those nights minghui would come home drunk and try to get his hands on him- all trembling and unsteady and bu fan hated it, like he hated the smell of booze on his breath and the marks on his neck that he didn’t put there.

  
“this. you and i.”

  
push and pull. that was all bu fan’s years at college reminded him of, and it made him sick to his stomach. he was sick of the way he would let minghui in wordlessly on saturdays only to wake up to an empty bed the next day. he was sick of telling himself that minghui loved him, that on nights minghui was sober and they were cuddled up on the couch, they kissed and it meant something.  
push. bu fan would take whatever minghui gave him, a text of “come over babe x” or moans of his name that stabbed bu fan right in the heart and left him breathless, urging him to fuck minghui harder, pull at his hair, give him the world if he wanted it. he took it all like the pathetic man he had become, living on scraps of affection that were never meant for him in the first place.  
pull. there were mornings were bu fan would wake up and minghui was still curled up under his arm, looking almost too innocent for all they had done and said last night. he wished he could brand these moments into his skin, for he knew he would need it when minghui would disappear for weeks without explanation. things like explanations, too, weren’t necessary for yue minghui.

  
push and pull, over and over. he didn’t know which was worse, he didn’t know who was worse. him, looking for love in the recklessness of minghui’s touches or minghui, leeching onto people like him like prey.

  
bu fan didn’t answer. minghui should’ve expected the silence that followed his words, thrown casually into the night and forgotten the next morning. that’s what minghui was, essentially- clipped, breathy phrases of “you’re so fucking beautiful, fanfan” and “you always make me feel so good” standard dirty talk, but it always resulted in him driving his blunt fingernails deeper down minghui’s back in a desperate attempt to stake claim; forgotten the next morning as the sunlight pushed out every hazy memory that bu fan insisted on clinging on to.

  
“you’ve gotten prettier.” minghui said after it was clear he would receive no response.


End file.
